Consumed. There is no middle ground.

Back in June I had some things churning in me. I was seriously struggling with something in my life and God ministered to me in that. I had these thoughts about this process that I'm seeing repeated in my life, so I decided to talk out my thoughts in front of my cell phone in a video (maybe a result of Keith being away).

I cut out about 5 minutes from the beginning of the video of me explaining how I tend to get completely consumed by problems - over and over in my life. And God sets me free, but then I end up getting consumed by something else. So, the problem isn't the things that consume me; the problem is me and my willingness to be consumed (as the pattern shows). But God is faithful to heal me and set me free and pull me up out of the pit. And I go on from there to form my main idea:

A beautiful response.

Beautiful, graceful, honest response by Bill Hybels to Howard Schults, CEO of Starbucks, after Howard canceled his speaking engagement at Willow Creek. This seems so much more Christian than engaging in a cultural war.

Some lines that aren't necessarily directly related.

Wanted to draw attention to some posts in my blogging community:

"Untitled" by nataliemma

and

"God's Teeter-Totter" by David and Jessica.

I. Love. Community.
(And I say that bearing in mind the pain & ugliness that comes along with it.)

I love being a learner.
But I also have this strong impression that, "the seed I've received I will sow."
Someday.

I want to walk humbly.

I've recently gone a step further into losing my life to find it.
I've died to some major things in my life.
And oh, it feels good.

Also,
"in quietness & confidence shall be your strength."

That was the typical verse on those name bookmarks that people buy you from Christian bookstores.
It's almost maddening to wonder how they nailed you.
Like the description of you based on your birth year you find on the placemats at Chinese restaurants.

The dual life.

Let my arduous efforts be kept in the secret spirit places.


Let the natural then flow.  Effortlessly.

A new way of thinking about the Sabbath.

dormant

"in a condition of biological rest or suspended animation"

That strikes me as really beautiful.

Some lines about how I'm doing right now.

starting to find some balance

I forgot how much pacing aids my prayers

things got pretty dark last week

but they needed to

keith just walked in

how can one person make me so happy

This Is Much Earlier Than I've Been Getting Up As of Late: A Haiku.

At the coffee shop

proud that I have gotten here

somehow this morning

Thrift Stores: A Haiku.

I love how thrift stores

invoke a feeling of wealth

endless riches yours

Wordle.net

We're hanging out at Nick & Rachels.  Tonight Rach's sister Bekah got into town for Christmas so we got to meet her for the first time.  She's a school teacher.  She just introduced us to this website, Wordle.net.  You can give it any text from a document or even just a website address and it creates a collage with the words it contains.  The more frequently the word is used, the more prominent it appears in the collage.  I just typed in my blog address, and this is what it gave me:

The word want is huge.  Hm.  Interesting.

A good word.

1 Corinthians 4:3-5 (New Living Translation)

³ As for me, it matters very little how I might be evaluated by you or by any human authority. I don’t even trust my own judgment on this point. ⁴ My conscience is clear, but that doesn’t prove I’m right. It is the Lord himself who will examine me and decide.
 ⁵ So don’t make judgments about anyone ahead of time—before the Lord returns. For he will bring our darkest secrets to light and will reveal our private motives. Then God will give to each one whatever praise is due.

Dictionary.com Word of the Day: Limn.

limn \LIM\, transitive verb:
1. To depict by drawing or painting.
2. To portray in words; to describe.

Oh, yes, I write, as I limn the familiar perfections of his profile, "you look very well."
-- Kimberly Elkins, "What Is Visible", The Atlantic, March 2003

In telling these people's stories Mr. Butler draws upon the same gifts of empathy and insight, the same ability to limn an entire life in a couple of pages.
-- Michiko Kakutani, "Earthlings May Endanger Your Peaceful Rationality", New York Times, March 10, 2000

But used faithfully and correctly, language can "limn the actual, imagined and possible lives of its speakers, readers, writers."
-- John Darnton, "In Sweden, Proof of The Power Of Words", New York Times, December 8, 1993

What a wonderful word. To limn people, things, ideas is what I have such strong urges to do. Oh, Lord, show me how.

Proverbs 13:3.

In my arts & crafts I've noticed a theme of redemption. I like using found materials that would either be thrown away or used for evil or unused or common and turning them into something beautiful; valuable; meaningful. This (above) is torn from an ad on the back cover of a fashion magazine that a friend gave me. The brown paper is from a paper grocery bag, the typewriter is from my mother & father-in-law's basement, and the staples are simply staples. No new materials were used for its creation. I saw the birdcage veil over the model's face, over her mouth, and it reminded me of the idea of guarding my mouth, as the proverb talks about. The veil is like the guard: whatever passes through it must be closely watched. The mouth isn't hidden, or sealed shut; it is also not opened wide. It is delicately & gracefully guarded. With this our life is preserved, the proverb says.

Polaroid instant camera status: Secured.

Thanks, Camera Land (our local camera shop on the Square), for having one used Polaroid camera in stock, waiting to be taken home by me. Now I just have to buy film (Camera Land did not carry any instant film). And as far as the rumors go about Poloaroid soon ending production of their instant film, it appears to be true. However, as the man at Camera Land told me, and as I have verified, Fujifilm continues to produce it. ::relief::

I want to use Polaroid photos in my arts & crafts; we will wait to see the fruition of that.

Along the same lines, to my great joy, Countywide Office Supply (where I purchased my label maker) had my typewriter ribbons in stock. I was definitely expecting to need to order it. Local businesses are magical places.

Since procuring the typewriter in January (from my mother & father-in-law's basement) it has opened a new door in my creative expression. There is something about writing in physical reality on paper, at the speed of typing, and with the clarity and uniformity of typed text. The look of typewriter text is classic and evocative and tangible. I have been taking pages of beautiful catalogs or drawings and typing scripture or poems or other text on them (example to the right). I've written cards & letters with it, and I find the typewriter the easiest way to do creative writing or to journal. I love it.

Speaking of arts & crafts, I'm going to take another art class at Western this fall. I'm definitely ready to return to that.


Update:
Film secured. Walgreen's is still carrying the Polaroid instant film; who knows for how long? Hopefully when it's no longer produced they (or someone) will carry the Fujifilm instant film. And wow: expensive. Each picture is to be used wisely.

I carefully chose my first shot: the view out our front door. Isn't it beautiful? I can't believe the beauty of nature we get to live in here in humble university housing. Our outside surroundings definitely make up for the couple of flaws inside the apartment.

Learning about words.

When words are many, transgression is not lacking,
but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.

Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense,
but a man of understanding remains silent.

Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets,
but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered.

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.

Prv. 10:19; 11:12-13; Jas. 1:19

I love learning new words!

After this post on the UO blog, I had to look up the meaning of esoteric. I'm so glad I did. I was familiar with the word, but not its definition. I feel like it would be a very useful adjective to have on hand:

es·o·ter·ic (ěs'ə-těr'ĭk) Pronunciation Key
adj.

1. 1. Intended for or understood by only a particular group: an esoteric cult. See Synonyms at mysterious.
   2. Of or relating to that which is known by a restricted number of people.
   3. Confined to a small group: esoteric interests.
   4. Not publicly disclosed; confidential.
2. 1. Confined to a small group: esoteric interests.
   2. Not publicly disclosed; confidential.

[Greek esōterikos, from esōterō, comparative of esō, within; see en in Indo-European roots.]

es'o·ter'i·cal·ly adv.

Feel free to practice using it in a sentence right here.

Dictionary.com: Word of the Day.

slake \SLAYK\, transitive verb:
1. To satisfy; to quench; to extinguish; as, to slake thirst.
2. To cause to lessen; to make less active or intense; to moderate; as, slaking his anger.
3. To cause (as lime) to heat and crumble by treatment with water.

intransitive verb:
1. To become slaked; to crumble or disintegrate, as lime.

I like this one. It seems very useful. Can you use it in a sentence?

An appropriate Word of the Day for Cornerstone.

discalced:
(adj.) Barefoot or wearing sandals. Used of certain religious orders.

Synonyms:
unshod, discalceate

Usage:
When a procession of discalced friars passed through the doors, I wondered if I should remove my shoes.


Can you use it in a sentence in the context of Cornerstone?

Share your sentence in a comment below.