please

pray for my family.

I love learning new words!

After this post on the UO blog, I had to look up the meaning of esoteric. I'm so glad I did. I was familiar with the word, but not its definition. I feel like it would be a very useful adjective to have on hand:

es·o·ter·ic (ěs'ə-těr'ĭk) Pronunciation Key
adj.

1. 1. Intended for or understood by only a particular group: an esoteric cult. See Synonyms at mysterious.
   2. Of or relating to that which is known by a restricted number of people.
   3. Confined to a small group: esoteric interests.
   4. Not publicly disclosed; confidential.
2. 1. Confined to a small group: esoteric interests.
   2. Not publicly disclosed; confidential.

[Greek esōterikos, from esōterō, comparative of esō, within; see en in Indo-European roots.]

es'o·ter'i·cal·ly adv.

Feel free to practice using it in a sentence right here.

The Office is Closed.

Perspective from the writers on strike.

"And be thankful." (Colossians 3:15)

Fun in the South.

Went to the show at the coffeehouse last night. This girl and this guy played together and they were absolutely great. So enjoyable. I ended up going by myself. The 'rents & grandpa stayed home, Kev & Keith dropped me off and went to do active-competitive-man things. I just sat in an arm chair, sipped my cinnamon spice tea and soaked it up. Perfect.

Tonight we all went to see the Rockets in the Radio City Christmas Spectacular at the Opry. I had never seen these famous kick-line tap dancers, and didn't quite know what to expect. But it was good. It exceeded my expectations. Lots of dancing, which I really love to watch. I love dancing. Wish I did it more.

This morning Keith and I went to the local Waffle House for breakfast. We love Waffle Houses. They are a vacation treat for both of us. There's something so charming, even magical about them; so dirty and artery-clogging and so friendly and comforting. Those classic yellow squares with black letters that haven't changed. The tiny interiors: booth or counter? A hard decision. The grits. Where do I eat grits Up North? I don't. The 50-something waitresses with raspy voices and too much makeup who always call you "hon". "More coffee, hon?" Eggs cooked just right. Pecan Waffles.

It almost makes me love America.

We're in Music City; we may as well.

Going to see if I can convince Keith & his fam to go see some live music at a local cafe tonight.

Also, it turns out that one of my agents lives here in Nashville on the weekends and he sent me a long list of cool stuff to check out here. Very excited about that.

In Nashville.

We're at Keith's brother's for the week. Keith's parents & grandpa were making the trip, and we decided to ride along. The last time we visited Kev down here was four years ago.

We left our cell phone at the place we had lunch in Indiana.

They have it there, and we'll get it back when we drive back through next Friday.

So in the meantime, we'll be able to check our voicemail, but no texting. A little texting fast for me.


Any Nashville recommendations welcomed.

Rue Royale show.

We're going to Nashville next week but if we're back in time, we're so there.

So they're still claiming me.

It was sweet of Elite to mention my recent opportunity on their myspace and in the press/news section of their website.

Disclaimer.

With all of this excitement, it's good to remember that there's always the possibility of any scene getting cut from a movie. In every film they have to leave out so much good material so it will fit into the time frame that audiences want, and you never know what will make the final cut....

And honestly, I probably will not find out until I go see it in the theater.

Either way, it's amazing that I got to do it and it will be such a good film!

(And if I don't make the final cut, we can always rent the DVD and look for me in the deleted scenes. ;))

Elise's new website is launched!

Check it!

I had to leave early the day of that shoot (for no good reason, it turned out...long story), but I'm so glad I got to be a part of it! Aren't the dresses and the photography beautiful??

And her Spring 2008 Fashion Preview is this Thursday!

Still trying to decide if this has all really happened to me.

Today went so well.

So well.

We did more footage of the same scene. So many more angles, including the closeup of me saying my line.

Shia and I chatted a lot more today, sharing more about ourselves, and even our views on God and faith and religion. Very cool conversations--he's open & genuine & contemplative. We're buddies. At least we were today.

The sketch we used in the scene--they let me keep it, and someone had him sign it for me (which I was already considering requesting anyway). He wrote to me: You're awesome! Thanx 4 helping us out! SHIA.

He's so precious. Such a great guy. He's definitely going to have a great career.

And the director, D.J., was so wonderful, too. I got to work with a lot of really cool people. The extra sitting beside me on the train was D.J.'s 12 year-old son, Brandon. Also extremely precious. We're buddies too.

So I'm done shooting. For now. And I absolutely loved it.

Only God knows what the future will hold.

If it's more acting...I would be thrilled.

Today I acted in a feature film.

Today went so well.

And they want me back tomorrow.

"We're definitely going to want you back tomorrow."

That wasn't planned. They want me back tomorrow.

So, in the scene: Shia's sketching the picture of me as we exchange a series of (flirtatious) glances, and then after a while I'm the one who gets off the train, not him. So I'm leaving the train, he hands the sketch to me, I look at it and say "What about the rest of me?", he says "Next time.", I get off the train, give him one last look & smile, and cut.

And partway through shooting, Shia writes his character's name and a phone number on the sketch. So now my character has his character's phone number. And they want me back tomorrow.

Pray for me.

I just want to be faithful with whatever God has for me.

I just want to love him and bring him glory and love people.

I am just in awe of what is going on.

The biggest news of my career.

I have gotten a one-line role in the feature film Eagle Eye.

!!!!!

I don't know where this came from.

Except God.

The audition was Monday, I got the call saying that I booked it Monday afternoon, the wardrobe fitting was Tuesday, and I'm shooting it tomorrow.

My character is a girl riding on the el train in Chicago. One of the main characters, played by Shia Labeouf, is sketching a picture of me. When he hands me the picture he's drawn, I say "What about the rest of me?" because it's incomplete. I think he has to cut off the drawing because he realizes he's being followed/chased. That's because he's been unjustly framed as a terrorist. The movie is a terrorist thriller. It's being produced by Steven Spielberg. He also wrote the story. The release date is in October 2008.

This is my first acting job ever. And it's a speaking part in a feature film. And I'm basically playing myself: I am the "girl on train" in real life. (Every time I go to Chicago I spent 7 hours round trip on Amtrak, not to mention taking the El all around Chicago once I'm there.) That's who I am! I do not think I could have dreamed up a more perfect entrance into the acting world. Even if this is the first and last acting job ever: how amazing.

On Tuesday after the wardrobe fitting I had to meet up with the director so that he could take some photos of me to sent to the sketch artists in L.A. for them to get the portrait ready to use in the scene.

Is this seriously happening?

This whole process has felt so spirit-led. This is not about me. I am no one. All the glory is God's. I am his.

Where do I start?

There has been so much going on inside me and around me over the past few weeks. I don't even know where to begin, and I am not prepared to write it all out now.

Pray for me, please.

More to come.

St. Louis weekend: awesome.

It was an amazing weekend. It felt a lot like this picture.

Dictionary.com: Word of the Day.

slake \SLAYK\, transitive verb:
1. To satisfy; to quench; to extinguish; as, to slake thirst.
2. To cause to lessen; to make less active or intense; to moderate; as, slaking his anger.
3. To cause (as lime) to heat and crumble by treatment with water.

intransitive verb:
1. To become slaked; to crumble or disintegrate, as lime.

I like this one. It seems very useful. Can you use it in a sentence?

The environmental impact of eating meat: you may be surprised.

As I'm usually dancing on the border of vegetarianism (I typically eat meat only rarely), and as the daughter of farmers, I found this article very interesting:

New Study Reopens Debate: Are Omnivores Better for the Environment Than Vegetarians?

The Crossing Macomb.

I've been waiting in anticipation for The Crossing to finally open here in Macomb. It's a church plant out of Quincy, IL, and they have been working on their Macomb campus for over a year now. They bought the old Thompson Food Basket building at Jackson & Wigwam (see above) and have given it an extreme makeover. Yesterday was their first service.

I am thanking God. It is a new, fresh addition to the body of Christ here. I worshiped uninhibited in spirit and in truth. I was taught the word of God in a powerful, pertinent way. I had communion with my brothers & sisters. The leaders felt genuine. The people were excited. I'm thanking God.

Keith was at a soccer game @ MSU yesterday, and he won't have a Sunday off for another few weeks, but he is so excited to check it out as soon as he can.

My prayer is that this new addition to the Church in Macomb will bring a fresh movement of the Spirit, and that it will not be about The Crossing but the glory of GOD. As we sang in worship there yesterday, "Not to us, but to your name be the glory." The Crossing is new and different and fresh and young for Macomb, but I pray that they will be unified with the rest of the body and that we would all work together for the glory of God.

"Not to us, but to your name be the glory."

Shawn McDonald.

My latest musical obsession has been Shawn McDonald. Acoustic, worshipful, organic, contemplative, melodic, rhythmic...basically all my favorite things in music. At this point, the album I recommend the most is Live in Seattle.

This guy has a beautiful testimony. Love his heart; love his music.

Day one of three completed.

It was a long day of hard work (don't laugh, I'm serious) and my feet hurt, but I'm feeling very satisfied and thankful.

I get to stay with my friend Lois, who is also modeling at the Bridal Market, who lives literally a couple of minutes' walk from the Merchandise Mart where the show is. What a huge blessing: the ease & convenience of that is incredible, and Lois and I are having a great time together.

I did my five runway shows today. They went great. It's fun-happy-flirty-smiley runway, which is super-easy. In a show, which lasts about 45 minutes, six of us models rotate through about 15 dresses each (that's almost a hundred dresses in 45 minutes). It's constant, fast-paced walk-change-walk-change. I'm working with a few of the same Maggie Sottero people from last fall, which is cool, and then a lot of new people. Always meeting new people in this business. Lois, Ashley D., and I ended the day with a relaxing visit to Starbucks.

Last night on my Amtrak ride up here, I sat in the cafe car and talked the entire trip to this precious, little, old Japanese lady who was on her first leg of a trip back to Japan for her sister's funeral. Words cannot describe the experience. It was so unique and wonderful. She is a practicing Buddhist, which led to engaging conversations about our faiths and life stories. She shared great wisdom from her life experience. We both had an amazing time listening to each other and both were very fascinated and impressed by each other. She lives in a small town near Macomb (she married a GI during the Vietnam years) and we exchanged contact info in hopes of getting together again.

Bridal Market.

This weekend (Saturday - Monday): The National Braidal Market in Chicago.

I'll be modeling prom dresses in mini-runway shows for the client Maggie Sottero.

More to come.

Google Reader.

I've been using & enjoying the new Google Reader for about a week now (see my "I read these" in the sidebar).

I'll let Chris explain it to you in this video (he knows a lot more than me, and he's pretty precious).


I also just discovered the "Next >>" button for your toolbar! This is my favorite thing with Google Reader yet! This button automatically takes you (every time you push it) to the most recent unread post from the blogs you are subscribed to! Then you can easily go to all of the recently updated posts from all your favorite blogs on their actual site (so you can easily leave comments if desired), not just in your Reader. Love it! Install Google Reader and the "Next >>" button on your toolbar today! ;)

Dr. Bronner's Magic Soaps.

I've recently gotten into Dr. Bronner's Magic Soaps. Dr. Emmanuel Bronner was a crazy revolutionary/master soap maker/Jewish German. His bio is fascinating.

I didn't know before what soap really even was, and I could not understand how the Dr. Bronner's soaps were made with simply natural oils, so I did a little research. Here, on the website is a great explanation. Honestly, after learning about it, I don't know how soap could get any better than this.

Also, here's a video about their recent effort to get all of the olive oil they use in their soaps from organic & fair trade sources in the Holy Land.

Al Sears Jazz Festival.

Today: The Al Sears Jazz Festival & the Gazebo Art Festival here in Macomb.

Al Sears was a legendary jazz saxophone musician from Macomb (pictured).

Keith, Ali, my friend Nancy, and I are about to head over to Chandler Park for the festivities now.

Keep in mind this annual Macomb event for future visits!

Hired.

I was pretty sure that I was supposed to hear back from Il Spazio mid-last-week, so when the week ended and I hadn't heard from them, I completely let it go. My pride was a little hurt, but it was good to work through that with God. I had asked him to have his way in the matter; only he knew what would really be best for me. The series of events around me applying for the job had seemed very spirit-led, but my thoughts are not his thoughts. If I didn't get the job, he was in control of that. So I released the illusion of pride once again, and was submissive and content.

So two days ago, as I was sitting in a Starbucks in Chicago with Ashley D. & Meredith, I got a call from Steve at Il Spazio asking if I was interested in working as a barista at the coffee bar in the restaurant. "Umm...yeah, sure!" We made plans for me to come in and meet him at 10:00 Friday morning.

I just got home from that. Steve gave me a tour of the whole place (it's going to be amazing), we chatted about coffee, espresso machines, farming, employee management, past work...and he told me to consider myself hired.

What a turnaround! I had so let go of that! But I'm so excited about it now. I really do love working in coffee. It's a skill set that I've acquired and I love the whole coffee culture.

So if all goes as hoped, I can work there in the mornings, be at my parents' in the afternoons to spend time with Alison after school, and then still have the evenings free. When I need to go to Chicago on a day I'm scheduled to work I can call around to my coworkers to find someone to cover my shift. I told Steve that that may happen from time to time, and he was fine with it as long as my shift is covered.

So I'm back in the coffee business!

Modeling update: the past three weeks.

I had been requested for the casting for the first-ever Burberry Prorsum Fashion Show in Millennium Park in Chicago, which would have been quite a show to get--Burberry is one designer that I actually really like. But alas, it was the same day as my dear friend Chad's wedding. Chad & Rachel's wedding was definitely more important than any fashion show! They had a lovely wedding in Greenville and I was so happy to be there for their beautiful day and see Chad's family. Keith had a game in Iowa, so I made the trip by myself. I also got to hang out afterwards with my old friend from Bushnell, Lisa, who is a student at Greenville. She gave me a campus tour. Thanks, Jill Hartman on Facebook for the photo. I had forgotten my camera.

Last week (3rd-9th) I had two print castings: Tuesday for Office Max and Wednesday for a medical uniform catalog. Also on Wednesday was small group with the other Christian girls with Elite. On Tuesday I had super-encouraging times with my friend Alli from Moody before the casting, and my friend Mireille from Elite afterwards. Then on Wednesday after the small group, I had coffee with Elise & Meredith, and that's when Elise gave me my silk wrap dress (for doing the print job for her)! Here is the dress (this isn't me modeling in these pictures). It can be worn endless ways! Mine is this beautiful blue-green color that is not shown.

On Wednesday after my casting I stopped in at the agency to drop something off, and my runway booker, Alyssa, had this list of things for me to do for the next two weeks. She hadn't heard anything from the print division about my new plan. *sigh* Communication.

So I was back up Friday for a runway casting. Also on Friday I got a bang-trim, and got tea with Lois, a newer friend of mine at Elite who's part of our small group. I'm amazed at how God has richly blessed me with friends who love him.

So, this past week I had to do the two jobs that Alyssa had booked me for, but I skipped the other casting because it was for a job that would not pay enough. The jobs she had booked for me were Monday and Saturday, and basically the same job both days. It was a show & "informal" at Saks Fifth Avenue on Michigan Ave. for their "Want it!" fall campaign, showcasing "fall's most coveted trends". Each floor at Saks had four models showcasing a new trend. The audience moved from floor to floor with a woman named Nena from Saks who explained the trends. I was on the second floor and we were "the cropped jacket". I wore a Zac Posen skirt/jacket/blouse combo in olive green (second from right in the picture below). On Monday we had two of these shows, and then yesterday there was one.
The rest of the time we did informal. Here is a modeling lesson: An "informal" is a job where you walk around a department store in designer clothing (essentially, living, walking, talking mannequins) often holding a small sign displaying the designer's name whose clothing you are wearing (example, right). You usually spend about 30 minutes walking around per outfit. Thanks to Meredith for taking this photo and the one before.

The last outfit I wore for the informal yesterday was this breathtaking dress (left) by Alexander McQueen. I loved it. It was so well-made, and beautiful, and it was my color. I seriously felt ready to walk down the red carpet. Thanks Elena (model to the right of me in the two previous photos) for taking this one in the dressing room with her iPhone.

Nena at Saks wanted all the models to have tons of makeup on-- "smokey eyes" with false lashes and red lips ("drag queen makeup", my runway booker calls it). I am not a makeup artist. I am not good at applying very heavy makeup. So Meredith was walking with me up to Saks, and she suggested that instead of doing my own makeup in some public restroom (which is pretty much what I always do in Chicago) that I stop and get it done for free at a makeup counter in a department store. GENIUS! I would have been too timid (or scared of being pressured into buying something), but with Mere's encouragement, I went to the MAC counter in Marshall Field's (I'm refraining from calling Field's by its new name) and got it professionally done for free. And Faith, the makeup artist (She was super-cool. She's an artist & works for MAC part-time.), didn't even pressure me to buy anything! MAC was even hosting an event about the smokey eye look that day. Smokey eyes with false lashes & red lips done professionally for free: check. Definitely going to remember that for future jobs I have to do my own makeup for. (And readers, remember the makeup counters in department stores when you want to get your makeup done professionally for free.)

Meredith spent the whole day with me yesterday! When I arrived at Union Station in the morning we met at Corner Bakery for an oatmeal date. Then she hung out with me while I got my makeup done, and watched the show and some of my other informal modeling at Saks. Brandon also met up with us there, because I had texted some Chicago friends about the show. After the job was over, Bran, Mere & I had dinner together at Bella Luna Cafe before I (barely) caught my train back home.

Ending the dualism.

Friends, thanks for your feedback. What Meredith said-- "I just don't want you to have yet another thing that makes you deal with your whole dual life issue." --really made me reconsider just focusing in on one aspect of my life. Because I really do feel like that's something God is doing in me right now--ending the dualism between my two worlds of Chicago and Macomb. And not "dualism" in some evil sense. Just in the sense that I feel torn between the two worlds. And when I'm trying to play this part of a model, it's hard to feel like myself.

Because, for example, there's a lot in me that hates mainstream fashion...hates heels...hates expensive or uncomfortable clothing...hates promoting myself...how does hating that stuff fit into being a model? I know that a person's external appearance doesn't matter at all. And yet, that's what I'm selling. But somehow, I think those things can fit into being a model...I know that sounds crazy. But I think it just means I am a different kind of model. Like, as Christians, we do what we are good at doing, but we do it in a different way--the way of Jesus. I'm trying to figure out how to bring the gifts & values that I feel like God has given me and cultivated in me into this crazy world of fashion modeling. And in that dark place I can be light. In that tasteless place I can be salt.

And to a certain extent, that's what I've been doing there. But there's so much more that God wants to work out inside of me so that he can impact the darkness around me to a much greater extent.

It's like first I had to figure out how to be a model. Now it's time to figure out how to be a different kind of model.

Getting this all worked out inside of me is hard. But it's good. Lord, have your way.

I couldn't handle it.

I couldn't handle my own face so intently staring at me whenever I looked at my blog.

So the header picture is gone. For now.

Still going through the blogging identity crisis. Will be resolved soon I hope.

New Heading?

What do you guys think of the new heading image? Narcissistic? Be honest.

It's an image from Elise's website--she's the super-cool local designer I met through Meredith. I did the print job for her in July. She only has this one picture of me up right now (until she launches her new site!). I really like the whole style of the picture though--hair, makeup, of course wardrobe (her stuff is beautiful), the black & white, etc.

Tell me what you think about my heading. Be honest.

Under construction.

As you can see, I'm playing around with the layout & look of my blog...

I'm wanting to make it more themed--make my posts more centered around the crazy modeling journey. When I think about writing about life in general, it's really overwhelming, because--like everyone I'm sure--I have so many thoughts about so many different things. I can still write about other things, but the modeling stuff could be the main thread throughout it all.

After all, that's the news that many people really want to hear about anyway. The rest of my life is probably either too boring or too personal.

What do you think?

The new game plan.

I got a call from Marissa (my main booker @ Elite) this morning. She and Jan (the V.P. @ Elite) had been discussing me and my career, and feel like I have plateaued. They want to take me to the next level. How? Two things: 1) more pictures in my portfolio (that meet their standard), and 2) traveling (which can provide the pictures if you go to an editorial-focused market...like Greece). But, they understand that the lack of money is holding me back right now.

So, this is their plan for me: From now through December, work here at home, and save money as much as possible. They will only call me to come up to Chicago if/when there are higher paying opportunities, so that I can save money on the back and forth travel and be available to keep working here at home. Then travel in January-February to Greece or a similar market, when I'll have enough money saved up to pay for it. I'll get lots of great pictures when I travel, and when I return, my new & improved portfolio will get me more jobs and take me to the next level. That is their plan for me.

I like it.

Only getting called about jobs with higher profit potential sounds GREAT. It's just so much more efficient in terms of the time & money involved in going to Chicago. It's something I've been wanting ask for, but I've held off because I know my place as a newer model (everyone has to work their way up and put in their time). So, it's what I want and it's their idea! Also it just feels good to get their encouragement to stay here and work. I love being in Macomb and investing in my life here.

I'm going to be helping my parents out, but I'm also going to look for another job here in Macomb. There is a new restaurant opening on the Square that has sparked my interest since the sign went up. Even while I was still planning to go to Greece, when I noticed that restaurant coming in, I had thought how nice it sounded to apply for a job there and just BE in Macomb. So, for the next few months...I will have that opportunity.

So, I filled out the application for "Il Spazio" this afternoon! And I just happened to read in the paper yesterday that the woman who was the owner of Bliss (the clothing boutique on the Square), whom I got to know through shopping there, has now sold it and is going to be the general manager at this new place! I guess this is a franchise of a restaurant in Kirksville, Missouri. It looks really cool. Check out the site.

I've been so utterly dependent upon God--just trying to follow the leading of the Spirit and being obedient to him. And each step is put before me at the proper time. God is preparing me and training me right now. For what, only he knows. But I am so sure that I am in training. My obedience & trust is being tested. I want to be faithful. Jesus said that he who is faithful with a little will be trusted with much. Whatever that "much" is--that's what I'm being trained for. I don't know if I've ever been so in tune with the Holy Spirit for a season of time as I have been lately. And I don't say any of this to boast. I'm just feeling such wonder at it all. Like a little child. Actually, I am boasting. In God. What he says is for real. The life of faith is for real.

I'm not going to Greece (unless the Lord wills it).

Well, friends, as far as I know at this moment, I am not going to Greece this fall.

God has a different plan for these next two months, so it seems.

And I am content with that.

What a time of growth this has been for me. He is shaping me and teaching me in such profound ways.

All the plans were in place with the Greek agency. Elite was planning for me to go. On the surface, the reason that I'm not going is that I cannot afford the plane ticket right now, and I don't think it's wise to borrow money to buy the ticket. And it is very likely that I'll have the chance again in the future to travel for modeling.

God's thoughts are not my thoughts; His ways are not my ways. Only he knows the real reasons for me to stay here for now.

His will be done, not mine. The depth of that statement is utterly mysterious & unsearchable & wonderful.

What freedom there is in it!

I don't know how much to explain here about this change of plans. If you have any questions, post a comment and ask.

My Seventeen is out.

Weird. I'm in Seventeen Magazine.

The "Hot Hair Ideas" the cover alludes to (on Ashley's shoulder) include one modeled by moi. Maybe I can help you "Find Your Style."

Just like Rufus & Meekus explain in Zoolander, "Models help people. They make them feel good about themselves. They also show them how to dress cool and wear their hair in interesting ways."

So here it is: My service to mankind. Hot Hair Ideas.

Check them out now. On newsstands everywhere.

Luv Charlie.

My latest work.

:)

In Wisconsin.

We're at Keith's family's cottage on Lake Delavan for the week.

The only internet access is at the Library here.

So not much blogging is going to happen.

But we're having a GREAT time.

More later.

Oh, maple syrup.

This is why I love it.

The end of a great weekend.

*sigh* It was a really fun, full weekend in Chicago with Natalie, Charity, Nate & Mere. Tons of walking around the city, concert in Millenium Park, fireworks at Navy Pier, going to Nate & Meredith's church...

Tomorrow: print job with Elise Bergman, a local designer who makes beautiful dresses. I met her through Meredith.

Elise is giving me one of those beautiful dresses. :)

Then I have to go to a "rehearsal" for Elite's huge 25th Anniversary Celebration. The party is Thursday night, and apparently they're parading us around on stage in front of 900+ people (many of whom are big deals) for entertainment & promotion. So we have to go practice that...

I'm now at Marcus' for the night and am hoping to catch up on some sleep.

Keith is at home and is leading worship for Teen Week at Argyle, which started tonight. Next weekend is Andrew and Sharon's wedding, which we are both standing up in. :)

I miss Keith. But by God's grace I have been doing well emotionally for the past few days.

Happy Birthday, Dad!!!

xo

No Listerine.

I did not get the Listerine commercial, but my great friend Ashley D. did!

She's shooting it now. I'm so excited for her!

And I'm just so excited that I've gotten called back to the first two commercial auditions I've gone to! I think that's a great sign!

YES. Better.

Today: great.

This confusion I've been feeling lately: definitely the Enemy trying to discourage God's work.

Today's models' small group: amazing time. God is so great!

Today's casting: I think I'm going to get booked for it.

Today's "fierce bikini poloroids" (as Marissa called them) to be sent to Greece, which she felt the need to take out on the sidewalk in front of the agency as people walked and drove by: actually went as well as that type of thing can go.

Getting together with Meredith tonight: wonderful talk.

This weekend with Natalie & Charity & Meredith here in Chicago: so excited.

I'm at Marcus' overnight because I found out today about a casting tomorrow. It's for Active Endeavors. They booked me for my very first paid print job ever. That was a year ago this past May. I had no idea how to move in front of the camera--I thought I did horrible and cried afterwards. It really wasn't that bad. But maybe tomorrow I can explain to them that last time we worked together was my first real print job and I'm much better at modeling now.

That's all for now. It's late.

xo

Needed: Perspective.

My mind is everywhere.

Home, Macomb, Chicago, Greece, Bushnell...

I have to stay grounded in the Word. Or I will seriously lose it.

I'm going there now.

Greece?!?

I got a call from Marissa yesterday.

Greece. Confirmed. 2 months. Leaving late August.

Just now getting a chance to process this...

Listerine & the Class of 2002.

I was called back for the Listerine commercial! I took the train up this morning & my callback was at noon. It went well! I should know by early next week if I got it, because it shoots on Thursday.

In order to make it back for my class reunion tonight, I was going to have to take an afternoon train to Galesburg and be picked up by someone. The ticket was going to cost me $51!

But I am so thankful: Leslie (my classmate & great friend who lives in Chicago) was driving down from Chicago today for the reunion. She pushed back her departure time a couple hours so that I could ride down with her. Perfect!

So now, the five year reunion of the Bushnell-Prairie City High School Class of 2002...

I have to go get ready.

StatCounter.com

If you have any kind of website, I really recommend StatCounter.

I just added it. It's way more than just a hit counter. It tells you all sorts of information about visitors to your site. Really interesting/fun/addictive.

Listerine.

Day trip to Chicago today.

My second TV commercial audition. It was for Listerine. It was simply three takes of me coming into the frame, rinsing out my mouth with water, spitting it out, going "Ahhh.", and leaving the frame.

Hope I get it! Seems like it would be a pretty easy first TV commercial to shoot.

Then I hung out with Ashley D., a fellow model, for the afternoon. She was going to come to Cornerstone this year, but ended up not making it. She gave me a bag full of some of her so-cute vintage clothes that she's passing on to me. Thank you!

I'm still going crazy inside spiritually, but I really don't know how to describe it with words. And I'm finding it really hard to get motivated with modeling stuff. I know I need to. I just have a really negative attitude about it right now. And I don't fully understand why... I'm feeling pretty conflicted and a little confused, if that wasn't already apparent. I think I may need some counseling. Anyone available?

My sweet green 60s Schwinn (see right) that I finally started riding at Cornerstone is ready after its tune-up at The Bike Shop! It should be in ship-shape condition now & I'm picking it up tomorrow morning! I feel like using my bike has started some kind of a new phase in my life. I'm excited about it.


Photo by Natalie Waymack

Happy Anniversary, Us!

We were wed three years ago this day.

Photo by Natalie Waymack

What an amazing three years it's been. Marriage just blows my mind. What a gift.

Stay tuned (for another couple of years) for details about our big Fifth Anniversary Bash!

The inspectors just came back.

And this time I'm not crying.

We worked pretty hard over the weekend on it, and then while I was in Chicago Sunday night through this morning, Keith finished up--and did an amazing job!

The best anniversary present!

We've sprayed white distilled vinegar on our mold a number of times, and then reluctantly tried a bleach cleaner, but nothing's really changed so far:

We're anxiously waiting the arrival of our tea tree oil in the mail, which is supposed to be a super-effective natural treatment.

But we passed regardless!

And now that it's all cleaned up, come over! There's room on our two vintage couches for everyone, and enough musical instruments to go around.

I've officially reentered the World.

I worked my first job since Cornerstone today. I'm officially back to real life in the World.

I've come down from the mountain.

Now about this veil over my face... weird. I'm feeling Moses right now. Anyone else?


My job was for Alyce Designs. Another prom dress job. Prom dress & wedding dress jobs have probably comprised a good half of my total work as a model. This job was basically a repeat of the job I had two weeks ago today (the Monday of Cornerstone week). It's been a big multi-week shoot of all of their designs for next year. I was so thankful to be asked back for a second day (a.k.a. another month's bills paid!). That's always a good sign--when a client likes you enough to request you again. And that's where steady income comes from--repeat clients.

Sadly, I got done about the same time my train pulled out of Union Station. So I wasn't on it. And the next train to Macomb is tomorrow morning. It's not really a big deal, except that tomorrow is our third anniversary. But it's okay; I'll be home tomorrow in time for Keith's lunch break. Last year I worked all day on our anniversary (another prom dress job--ha! it's still online!). Keith drove up for the day with me and after it was over we went to Thai Bowl (one of our favorite restaurants while we were dating/engaged & I was living at/near UIC). It was fun. :) Tomorrow, I don't know what we'll do. We're tight on funds right now, so we may be forced to be creative--which will probably be super-fun!

And it's turned out to be a great evening here in Chicago, as I had a wonderful sushi dinner with Marcus and a great cup of tea at the Bourgeois Pig with Meredith; and great conversation with both of them.

mewithoutYou.

I haven't blogged much yet about my new favorite band.

I've realized I'm the type of person who is really into one musical artist at a time. Then after I've gone through my initial exclusive obsession with them, I add them to my little garden of favorite music and wait to see what further fruit they'll bear.

My current fixation is mewithoutYou. Wow.

I saw them again this year at Cornerstone, and had the added pleasure of being at Aaron's (the lead singer) talk at the Jesus Village tent. It's hard to describe how God's used him to encourage me.

This is a video of an interview with him I found on YouTube.

Three ways to kill mold naturally.

If anyone else is having mold problems in their home, here is a great article about natural treatments for it:

http://www.care2.com/greenliving/three-ways-to-kill-mold-naturally.html

Inspection failed.

On Tuesday two grad school-aged building managers with name badges and clipboards came by our apartment for our annual health and safety inspection. I was home alone at the time and welcomed them in.

We failed.

I was very embarrassed. After they left, I cried. Then I went to go meet Keith as he was walking home from work and cried to him. Just silly feelings, but they hurt nonetheless.

Too much clutter. Dirty dishes. Mold in our ceiling (which has been there since we moved in & I see more as the university's responsibility). I told them (which was meant as a compliment) that I had only seen one bug the whole time we've lived here. They questioned me to find out what kind it was, deduced without evidence that it was a cockroach, and wrote it down on our evaluation as another category that we failed.

I knew that none of that really mattered, but it just really hurt my feelings.

Especially since much of the clutter was simply stuff we had brought into the apartment from the car after our many recent travels, and we just hadn't had the time to go through it all yet.

We've been wanting and planning to get the place back in order so we can joyfully show hospitality more easily again...

It's just now we will be doing it with a deadline and the added motivation of avoiding eviction.

They'll be back in a week.

I am humbled.


Blessed be the Name of the Lord.

Going bananas. How appropriate.

So, I just got a precious little forward from my friend Brandon. His Grandma sent it to him.

The subject was "Going Bananas". How appropriate. I just posted about that very thing.

The forward, though, unlike my state of mind, is about literal bananas. And I think you're less likely to go bananas while reflecting on actual bananas, than while reflecting on God and life. But God created bananas, so maybe they can invoke this same wonder.

Reflect on this:

Bananas contain three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fiber. A banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy. Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes.

But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.

PMS: Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.

Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.

Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.

Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school (England) were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.

Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.

Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.

Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and chips. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.

Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.

Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand , for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer tryptophan.

Smoking & Tobacco Use: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack.

Strokes: According to research in The New England Journal of Medicine, eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!

Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape!

So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around

So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, "A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"

PASS IT ON TO YOUR FRIENDS

PS: Bananas must be the reason monkeys are so happy all the time! I will add one here; want a quick shine on our shoes?? Take the INSIDE of the banana skin, and rub directly on the shoe...polish with dry cloth.

Amazing fruit!!!

Ahhhh!

I have so much passion and thought and wonder brewing inside of me...

What do I do with it?

Let's dream together!

A must-read.

I would like to call attention another amazing piece of blogging from Natalie:

"Sometimes at work, I die of boredom."

Leave her comments.

Até mais.

Wow! Hello to my new reader, Rodrigo. Check out his comment on my previous post. I've deducted that it is Portuguese, and here is what Babel Fish tells me he says (better translations welcomed...Steph? Natalie?):

Oi, I found yours blog for google tá well interesting I liked this post. When to give gives passed for mine blog, is on personalized t-shirts, shows step by step as to create a well personalized t-shirt way. Until more.

Thank you, Rodrigo! We'll be sure to check out your blog.

Oh, Hesstopia.

Ali is playing with Eliza today. Now that I have the time for my modeling blog update, I'm too excited about other things.

If it was still May, I would worry about this hesstopia.com fixation getting borderline obsessive.

But, in four days I will be at Cornerstone 24/7, so I'm not worried at all!

Come, join the fun!

Thank you, Ali.

As my little 7-year-old sister, Alison and I were working in the camper this morning, she had an amazing idea for the campsite theme this year.

Canada.

Yes.

Stay posted at hesstopia.com.

Hesstopia.com.

My computer-whiz friend, Chad Garrett, is working on an official website for our Cornerstone campsite!

Hesstopia.com

This is the same Chad who made the life-size cardboard cutout of Natalie for Cornerstone 2005. And our wedding video.

Yes, he's pretty amazing.

I'm a ramblin' man.

I got home yesterday morning from my four days in Chicago....exhausted from a late, wonderful night with Meredith. I went straight out to my parents' to see them off for their 30th anniversary Alaskan cruise. I then had a couple of hours at home before Young Marrieds' Fellowship hosted by Jason & Ginger.

Keith and I were about to get to bed at a decent time when we started reading aloud together The Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne. 50 pages later, we went to bed too late. We got up relatively early (7:something) this morning (still very exhausted) to get packed and head to Bloomington-Normal. Today was the beautiful wedding of Michael O'Brien and Erin Simpson. Keith got to go the driving range with the guys when we got over here, and I got to buy a new pair of shoes because I forgot mine. I got some fabulous blue wedges at Target for like $13.

The wedding was in a place called Funks Grove and absolutely gorgeous. It was out in the woods. The pews were enormous logs. The alter was made from small logs. The table with the guestbook & programs was a huge stump. The trees formed a ceiling with sunlight filtering through over this small forested chapel. Just gorgeous. A little warm today, but totally worth it. The reception was very fun, too. And indoors, so a little cooler. We got to hang out with my UIC BFF, Sharon, and her fiance, Andrew, who is one of Keith's BFFs (but he would never call him that) and the twin brother of the groom. (BTW, Sharon & Andrew met at our wedding...and now they're getting married. We feel like proud parents.)

Also at the wedding we saw Evan & Ronni, whom I haven't seen in years. And we had a great time with them. We hung out with them from after the ceremony through the whole reception. For anyone who knows this part of our history, you know that tonight I am feeling a huge sense of resolution. Tonight I am feeling closure in a very large, long struggle. Tonight I am praising God. Tonight I am feeling f r e e d o m. I keep having those deep, happy sighs.

So now we're back at Dave Rawlins' where we're staying. We're hanging out with Dave & his little sister Mindy. I've been hearing about how some of Dave's friends in high school *cough-Meredith-cough* would beg Dave to take Mindy with them to go do girl stuff and then try to get her to spill some coveted information about the secret life of David Rawlins. Has anyone ever heard of this?

My little sister, Ali, is with our big brother Marcus in Chicago for the weekend (as Mom & Dad fly northwest and set sail) and then we'll be staying with her at my parents' house for the week. We're meeting up with Marcus tomorrow afternoon somewhere on I-55 to make the trade. Then...Keith and I may just have to take her to Chuck E. Cheese's, since she had to miss out on that for her birthday this year. (Actually, Keith just is using her--he's the one who wants to go.) (Which I can understand, I mean, it is where I celebrated my own 15th.)

Tomorrow morning we're going to church with Dave. Then maybe Monday morning I will get to sleep as long as I want and get fully rested again. As long as Ali doesn't wake me up.

Went.

And it was marvelous.

Thank you, Meredith.

Very cool little coffeehouse venue.

Amazing music that makes you think & feel.

Beautiful worship out in the world.

Rue Royale is a husband & wife band.

She is from England and also did Operation Year in the UK like I did!

We had a nice little chat with them after the show.

Love
them.

Everyone make sure you listen to them on myspace. And then go see them at Cornerstone.

Gallery Stage
Friday
2:05-2:45 PM

Missing Rue Royale by a couple of hours!

Meredith is going to see Rue Royale in Chicago tonight!

For Free!

If I hadn't been away from Keith for three days, or if I wasn't going to have the privilege of seeing them at Cornerstone, I would stay another night and go with her in a heartbeat.

June, 14 2007 at Uncommon Ground (Green Room Sessions Event)
3800 N. Clark Street
Chicago, Illinois 60613-2812
Cost : Free

http://www.livegreenchicago.com/

If you're in town, GO!


UPDATE:

Oh man....I just went to that last link....it sounds so amazing and wonderful!

I may have to rethink...

And take Amtrak home in the morning...

Oh, decisions.

Advance Ticket Sales End Friday 06.12.07.

From the Cornerstone site:

Advance Ticket Sales end at midnight on Friday, June 15! Order today for your best chance to save on the most fun you'll have all summer. With hundreds of bands, an abundance of teaching at cstoneXchange, games for all ages, extensive arts programming, and lots of activities for kids there's something for everyone. If you can't purchase tickets in advance there will be plenty of tickets available at the gate. Don't forget to look at "When Should I Arrive" in our F.A.Q. section so that your entry to Cornerstone goes as smoothly as possible.

The task of updating is getting bigger with each passing day.

Honestly...when will I have the opportunity to update my blog about the last few weeks' modeling news & events?

I'm either working in some form, without internet access, exhausted, or savoring a sweet moment of rest &/or fun.

Life has been great, God is at work, and I am so happy; just very... [searching thesaurus.com for a synonym for busy, because it's what everyone says about their lives, like being busy in and of itself is this noble cause] ...engaged. active. bustling. hustling. humming. (Other suggestions?)

And I'm humbly asking God for an easily portable device on which I can get online. I have so much downtime on the train and around the city during which it would be so advantageous to have internet access.

Does anyone know the non-brand name for a Blackberry?

Right now, I am
c.) exhausted.

So, I'm going to go enjoy a relaxing shower and my gracious brother's guest bedroom.

An appropriate Word of the Day for Cornerstone.

discalced:
(adj.) Barefoot or wearing sandals. Used of certain religious orders.

Synonyms:
unshod, discalceate

Usage:
When a procession of discalced friars passed through the doors, I wondered if I should remove my shoes.


Can you use it in a sentence in the context of Cornerstone?

Share your sentence in a comment below.

3 things that keep me healthy, well, & whole.

1. Sleep. (full night--at least 9 hours for me)
2. Water. (first thing in the morning & plenty throughout the day)
3. Walking. (about an hour a day)

Sorry for all the mini-posts lately...it's all I've had time for.

But there is more in store.

Comment!

If you want to leave a comment, and you don't have a Google account (Ashley Rodgers, etc.), just write your comment and under "Choose Your Identity", just choose "other" or "anonymous".

Coming soon.

There is so much I want to blog about...I think I may burst if I don't get the chance to write soon.

Okay, Everyone...

Let's start talking about and getting excited about Cornerstone.

Who are the top bands you're excited about? Top seminars? Top films?

Some of mine (this is a work in progress):

Bands

• Relient K (I just can't stop)
• Rue Royale (my latest obsession)
• Cool Hand Luke (thank you for reuniting!)
• Leeland (live worship!)
• Starflyer59 (always fun & creative)
• Copeland (amazing live)
• The Myriad (yes)
• Anberlin (I'm liking Cities)
• mewithoutYou (Aaron is the closest thing to how I imagine the Old Testiment prophets)
• David Crowder (a classic...all-out worship)

Seminars

• ORDINARY RADICALS, Shane Claiborne
• "WHOLE-ISTIC"CELTIC COMMUNITY, Brad Culver: Refuge Ontario & Peter Wohler: Source Community Minneapolis

Films

• I Vitelloni Federico Fellini, 1953
• What Would Jesus Buy? Rob Van Alkemade, 2007

Visual Art

• Pilgrimage 2007. This year's theme will be "The Names of God."

Your turn...

Have you noticed my feeds?

They are in the right-hand column here on my blog. I'm pretty excited about them.

Here is how you do it:
Go to the blog you want to add, and click on the feed icon (see left). It will take you to another similar site that talks about subscribing. You can ignore the page, but just copy that site address. In the "Add and arrange page elements" section of your blog template, click "Add a page element" and choose to add a feed. Paste the address into the box, choose your preferences about the layout, and voila! You have your friend's blog feed right there on your blog.

Are you able to do it, Nat? :)

Memorial Day weekend in Peoria.

Each year my family gets together in some Illinois city for Memorial Day weekend. This year it's downtown Peoria.

I like downtown Peoria. Especially the Riverfront.

This morning we all walked a few minutes to Riverside Community Church for their 11am service. Loved it.

Now we're headed off to a Peoria Chiefs baseball game. Should be fun. If we're in the first 1,500 people to show up at the game, we get a free bobble-headed figurine or something. Dad and Ali are really excited. I'm looking forward to a hot dog.

As my brother-in-law just said, "Hot dogs...are pretty much awesome."

I like the way summer is looking.

Ahhh....back home.

I went up to Chicago yesterday morning, planning to have Abercrombie poloroids with Marissa, but ended up having a little meeting with her and Jan instead. (Apparently I was supposed to bring my bikini for the A&F poloroids, but I didn't know that. So we rescheduled them for Tuesday.) So in our little meeting we talked about the summer and generally where my career is going. It was good. Jan is so wonderful. She's the V.P. of Elite Chicago, and has been so behind me and believing in me since the day of my open call when I met her.

So, traveling abroad isn't really panning out for this summer, and we think I'll wait and travel in the fall. I love this, because this summer is when I get more time with Keith, Alison, Ashley, and lots of other people I love. In the fall, Keith will be traveling around a lot with soccer, Ashley will be in Prague, Ali will be back in school, etc., so I think it's a much better time for me to be away. So this summer I'll live in Macomb, keep working in Chicago and maybe traveling within the country for specific jobs, and testing whenever I get the chance. My modeling goals will be to make money, get more experience, and build my portfolio as much as possible while staying based in Chi-town.

As far as the test this past Tuesday with Alex Rivera, it went well. I had a great time. The test was organized by the makeup artist, Beth, and for most of the day it was just the three of us, because the wardrobe stylist left early. Alex is this super-sweet guy, Puerto Rican, grew up hardcore in church but has strayed away lately. Beth was raised Catholic but didn't stick with it and has a little boy who she prays with every night and who is starting to ask some big questions about this God they pray to. The three of us got to have some cool conversation about church, Christians, God, etc. I'm constantly amazed at the opportunities put before me in this business.

As for the actual photos, I don't know if Elite will like them enough for my book or not. We'll just see what they think when Alex finishes them and sends them over. He's still relatively new to fashion photography, and has just recently started using agency models, so it could go either way. I'll post some of the pictures when I get them.

More to come about the official Elite Spring Party & Afterparty last night...

Ooo....update! Two of the three looks we did for the test are up on his site. There are three photos from each of the two looks in the "portraits" section. They are pretty, but probably too "commercial" for my book. But I'm always happy to test--it's great for experience in front of the camera and I know it helps out the other people involved.

Staple: tea.

love it.

drinking it now, in fact.

Psych!

Little did Marissa know, the test today was with Alejandro Rivera, not Jeff Stella.

Not now, New York.

I heard back this morning from Marissa (my booker @ Elite Chicago) about the feedback from NY.

Basically, it's "not now."

Most of them want to see my portfolio developed more, which I can understand. And there's definitely still potential for the future in NY.

Speaking of developing my portfolio, I also just found out that I have a test tomorrow in Chicago. It's with a photographer named Jeff Stella. Hopefully the photos will turn out well and I'll get to add them to my book. Also, my editorial in Newcity Chicago's Botiqueville should be out within a couple of weeks, which will surely make the cut for my book.

It'll be great to have some new stuff in there. I need it.

In other news, it's great to be back in Macomb. I love Macomb. And what beautiful weather!!! I'm praising God for it.

"Liberal hippies don't work at investment firms."

Ahhh...another great quote from my deep-thinking, intellectual, beautiful cousin/bff, Natalie.

Check out the whole post.

We're back in Chicago. Still no news from my agency about NY.

"The plans of the heart belong to man,

but the answer of the tongue is from the LORD."

(Psalm 16)

Exhaling.

I've visited 5 agencies over the past two days. In order: New York Models, Elite, Wilhemina, Trump, Next. My visits are over now.

Now I wait...

I should hear back in the next couple of days.

Keith and I met up with an amazing girl, another model who also started with Elite Chicago and has been working out here for five years or so. We had been in contact via email last fall, but hadn't met in person until today. And we discovered that we're both Christians! And she does nutritional/holistic counseling! We had so much in common, it was almost scary. I'm sooo thankful for meeting her. I guess she would be my new best friend in NY. ;)

Marcus, Shanna, and we went out to an Italian place across the river in New Jersey tonight. Ahh...it was so good. I was celebrating being done with my agency visits. Fettuccine with mushrooms, olive oil, and lots of garlic, and an espresso martini. Oh my goodness, it was so good.

We've done a lot of walking around the city and are starting to get a handle on Manhattan south of Central Park.

We
love
it.

If we get the opportunity, we will move here in a heartbeat.

(But Macomb/Bushnell will always be home and we'll always miss it and come back often.)

Tomorrow morning we're going to check out Central Park. And we want to buy doughnuts or bagels from one of those street vendors.

Last night: The Phantom of the Opera on Broadway. Awesome. Keith loves musicals. Loves them. And I think it's so adorable.

In Psalm 31 David tells God, "my times are in your hands." That's the phrase I've been repeating all day. He knows and controls how this all goes.

New York City.

In 36 hours, Keith and I will be on a plane to New York!

We're going out to visit my big brother and his wife, Marcus & Shanna.

Plus, Elite Chicago is sending me to see the top NY agencies...

My life could drastically change after this next week.

God, you are in control of all of this. It's for your glory.

"Some trust in chariots, and some in horses,

but we trust in the name of the Lord our God."

Psalm 20.

Diet Rule #12: Cheat whenever you want.

Mmmm....Keith and I went to Sunrise this morning. That's our favorite restaurant to go to for fun breakfasts. It's kind of the IHOP of Macomb, since we aren't a big enough city to have the chain sit-down restaurants--which I love about Macomb. I support the independent, local, small businesses.

Anyway, I had a pecan waffle covered with "butter" & syrup and a coffee....it was awesome. I loved every bite. I'm a believer that if you're going to eat something that has no nutritional value, you should savor it and do it for the emotional value. And if you really slow down and enjoy your food, you will not gain extra weight.

Do you know that Natural Cures 'They' Don't Want You to Know About infomercial guy, Kevin Trudeau? He may seem a little nuts, and his methods may seem shady, but he actually has accumulated a huge base of good information about natural health & cures. And I generally agree with him. I became familiar with him after borrowing one of his books from my father-in-law (who wasn't that into it). Then, just today I decided to do a free trail membership of his website.

Anyway, he puts the enjoy-your-food theory to words very well in the twelfth bullet of the diet guidelines in the chapter, "How to Lose Weight Effortlessly and Keep It Off Forever":

Cheat whenever you want: You want ice cream, cookies, cakes, chocolate,
French fries, pizza, potato chips? Don’t deprive yourself. It’s better to eat
something without guilt than not eat something and feel bad about it.

From best to worst it looks like this: You are offered a piece of chocolate
cake; you look at it and decide that you’re full and wouldn’t really enjoy it so
it does not look that appealing to you. You politely say no thanks and feel
great about your choice. You feel no deprivation. This is ideal.

Next would be: You are offered the chocolate cake and you decide that you
want it even though you are trying to lose weight your desire for the cake is
very high. You say yes and eat the cake with happiness and glee. You enjoy and
savor every bite. You’re amazed at how wonderful it tastes. You are happy that
you are experiencing these incredible, pleasurable sensations of this delicious
cake. This is not ideal, but it is second best.

(example: me, this morning @ Sunrise)

Next would be: You are offered the chocolate cake and you struggle with the
decision. You know you are on a diet, but you can’t help but imagine how
wonderful this cake would taste. Inside the voice says nothing tastes as good as
being thin feels. You struggle some more, you really want the cake, but you also
want to stick to your diet. You decide to be strong and even though would love
to be eating that cake you say no. This is bad. It is better to eat the cake and
enjoy it, than not eat the cake and be stressed out over it. The interesting
statistics prove that eating food without guilt keeps you thin. Not eating food
and being stressed about it can make you fat. Eating food and feeling guilty and
bad about it makes you obese.

Lastly: You are offered the chocolate cake, and you really want it. But you
know you’re on a diet and you struggle with the decision whether to indulge or
be strong. You feel weak and become upset with yourself because the desire for
the cake becomes overwhelming. You breakdown and eat the cake knowing full well
that you shouldn’t. You feel guilty and bad about yourself. This is the absolute
worst. Remember, if you choose to absolutely enjoy it, be happy. Do not feel
guilty or bad about it.

Well said, Kevin. Agree.

LA trip postponed.

My print job in LA has been moved to June.

I'm kind of relieved! Traveling to LA right before NY was going to be a little much.

And next week is the last week for some of my Western friends (Nancy!)--now I'll get to spend it with them!

I've got my priorities straight.

I am officially booked out from Elite for Cornerstone 2007!!! I WILL be there!

...will you??

June 25-30, Bushnell IL, baby!